Chances are, you are my chances *

Subject:	missing you
Time:	10:00 pm

It never occurred to me the first time i saw your face that i would fall so deep, and you just cant be replaced

this is not the love that I had intended. for me and you
can't tell how I got off track, dont know how it all went bad.
dont know what to do.

always felt you were so out of reach
i need you and you're so far from me
what were we searching for
i dont recall
what were those words you said?
nothing at all.

the thoughs keep rolling throught my head.
i'm thinking about what you said.
"rejections what I fear"
my dreans are to good to be true.
there's so much I'd say to you.
but you're not here.
dont go away

went to the Game in EL with the girls I had a good time it was REALLY cold... we won!!! and yeah

#33/16 ;) Oh AMES your going to have to work your magic for me!!!!ahaha great time girls!

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May 19th, 2004

Subject:	Aprils 2nd entry
Time:	03:07 pm

shit me and chels are supposed to work on that science project together right now but FUCK it! haha we learned about dykes today in science class and some ppl already got a head start on learning that one haha but neways

im tired of those who think they know what the fuck they are talkin about how bout u shut ur fucking mouths and move on and GET OVER IT... ill have a talk w/ them and set things straight - cant fucking wait

taylors a great girl and i hope she can forgive me for not coming over her house but we will hang out soon!!!

im too lazy to write
>>> i hate dikes <<<

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May 18th, 2004

Subject:	im officially missing you *
Time:	09:39 am

This weekend was intresting ... friday was good... Sat. was maybe the worst day ever! I felt bad for keri i hope you had an ok birthday hun and im really sorry that there was so much shit going wrong and so much DRAMA! but yeah I really didnt like walking 7 miles home from 1-4:30 am beucase of some fuckers who stole my fucking cell phone and aprils 50$ ..... i was lucky april was there with me! then sunday i went shopping w. my mom and my sister. Then yesterday me and april went to apply for jobs, then we went to the mall... and matt wa working so we talked to him for a little bit. then i got herassed by spanish people! it was pretty scary then april bitched them out...

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May 13th, 2004

Subject:	We Are The Sex *
Time:	10:02 pm

Boring day...

I had my gay Confirmation rehearsal today... then tomarrow i have my confirmation... and yeah all my friends ar coming hahaha there going to sit there for like 2 hours an be bored out of there minds... god i have great friends!

Then Sat. is Ker's Birthday!!!!!! its going to be fun

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May 11th, 2004

Subject:	haha Taylor ur GREAT *
Time:	08:04 pm

SimplinPink: I know its not in your LJ but I thought it would be fun anywaysss

I adore Chelsea

Chelsea is sexual

If I were alone in a room with Chelsea I would to be honest, Makeout with her.. cause shes a fantastic kisser!.

I think Chelsea should get what I had that one time :-)

Chelsea needs a good guy.. cause she deserves one

I want to keep Chelsea Forever!

Chelsea reminds me of Summer from the OC

Without Chelsea I would have a lonely study hall!

Chelsea can be bitchy. (but I like it)

Worst thing about Chelsea is she always makes it my fault.

Best thing about Chelsea is no matter how much we fight, she will remain close with me.

When I think about Chelsea I See her humping a car!!!!!!!!!

Chelsea is my angel/ best friend.

Filled out by: The One and Only

( Somthing Priceless )

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Subject:	everytime you move I let a little more show*
Time:	07:00 pm

Today was a pretty boring day..

Spanish- hahaha Lex and Taylor came to get me...and then we got in trouble for being in the caf

Seminar- did some gay cooking project...

Science- God I hate that class

Study- went to gym to hang out with tay ker and katie... Taylor played pickle ball with some boys.. i wasnt allowed to play becase " i dont do anyting" phsss please hahaha then when no one else wanted to play they begged me to play with them.... yeah thats right! ummm Wanna be a Porn Star??? lol Ker

Then after school April came over... we had some of our talks it was fun....

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May 6th, 2004

Subject:	Girls just wanna have fun *
Time:	09:37 pm

A fool could see Just how much I adore you
I get down on my knees I'd do anything for you

( You Could have had all of me )

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May 3rd, 2004

Subject:	Too much for me to deal with...*
Time:	07:43 pm

Well I had a really good day... well at the end it was the best i got to hang out with Eve and have some good talks with her... we hardly talk anymore... but yeah April pick all us girls up from school (Kels Ker Lex) and it was CRAZY!!! hahaha well yeah then we went to kelseas for a little bit and I saw her Prom dress and its soooo HOT!!!! i cant wait to go shopping with Eve to get mine!!!! But yeah then i went to Aprils and hung out there for a while... then i got home and talkes to AMY!!!!! I love her so much and i like how me and her have become really close we understand eachother alot!!! and she stands up for me which is even better

<3 you girls!

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May 1st, 2004

Subject:	...and you can have it back anytime you please
Time:	05:06 pm

nothing intresting has happend... Me and Eve are going to get our prom dresses together... and im really happy about that Yesterday I went over aprils and we went to see mean girls! it was funny i liked it.... i was so upset i didnt get to see it with Amy and Katie!!!!! but april and her mom were having a talk for like 2 hours.... so yeah today i had a bonding day with my mom and stuff it was ok... well thats about it <3 Chels

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April 28th, 2004

Subject:	oh god.... how she hates it when he begs* hahaha
Time:	10:03 pm

hmmmm April came over today it was fun... we talked about relationships and i realized i have the worst timeing in the world to deside i want one! haha yeah but Taylor wasnt in school today it was pretty upsettting at least it wasnt a white day beucase if it was i would have to kill myself.... beucase a white say with out taylor just doesnt happen.... but yeah yesterday i went over her house... on the car ride there i looked at ryans pictures from his trip it made me want to get out of waterford so bad! it was like so pretty... and then i look outside the car window and waterford it just boring theres nothing special about it... but yeah then when we got to taylors we had a picnic.... and then i got bored and did cheerleading shit... and i kinda fell ALOT beucase i got cought up in my pants, it wasnt pretty i was covered in grass stains but u know what i liked it alot! ok well yeah nothing else really happend....... hopefully i will have some good news to share SOMETIME SOON!!!!!! ha ;)

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April 26th, 2004

Subject:	I wanna feel the same *
Time:	08:01 pm

OK so I have decided to give up on 3 things that people THINK i need psshhhh please lol even though i have NO support from my BEST FRIENDS! (thanks guys) im still going to just not do them anymore i think it will make things a lot better and easier for me.... i guess im going to be the mom from now on girls.... well im thinking just for the rest of the school year.... when summer come Tay your going back to being the mom hahaha.... well yeah we'll see how long this lasts hmmmm....lol

(I may look but your the only one I see)

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Subject:	Nothing will compare *
Time:	08:37 am

it's the small things that make or break a relationship, if someone means the world to you, dont let them think otherwise, show them...so they have no doubts in their mind that you would do anything for them

I wish I could drive away to the sunset...
... back to the day we first met

Even though were not togehter, my heart belongs to you

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April 25th, 2004

Subject:	Missing you *
Time:	07:01 pm

I'm not a perfect person
As many things I wish I didn't do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you

I'm sorry that I hurt you
It's something I must live with everyday
And all the pain I put you through
I wish that I could take it all away
And be the one who catches all your tears
Thats why i need you to hear

I've found a resaon for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is You [x4]

I'm not a perfect person
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you

I've found a reason to show
A side of me you didn't know
A reason for all that I do
And the reason is you
^^ :(

Yesterday I slepted over Aprils... it was fun we got to drive... we went to shoprite to get romen noodles and we went by robbys house for a little bit and april being the BAD driver she is almost hit a mail box and went up on the curb hahaha u suck april!!!! then we went to the mall for a quicky haha but yeah then today me and april walked to the mall and lexi got a ride and we all hung out there for a couple hours and i got HOT sex underwear and yeah.... LMAS yeah cuz thats how i do.. right april hahaha but yeah i had a good time it hasnt been the best couple of days but april and lex i wanna thank you guys for being there for me it means alot to me <3 chels

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April 23rd, 2004

Subject:	"Your SO out of the nest.....pshh"
Time:	07:35 pm

I just had 3 of the most amazing days

Well first I went to Tays house ... we went out a little, we fucking walked a mile oh yes and i was in heels... im so dumb sometimes but yeah anyways we got a ride home with Kenny because he's such a sweet kid all us girls like him a lot ... he's a great guy but yeah then i was on the phone w. ass and Taylor got moody and kicked me off beucase well,… Taylor is a whore haha then the next day i went to Amy's ALL of my favorite people were there and i loved it ... we set up a tent and campfire and it was just amazing.... my girl scout training came in handy hahahaha... but yeah we ended up not sleeping out side because of Todd ... then later after all the fun i had to deal with some shit which i had to say wasn't my favorite thing to do at 1:30 in the morning but yeah..... it sucked and now he like isnt talking to me :(... then me and the girls had a long talk about things ... then we went to bed but i didn't really sleep because im sick and i couldn't breathe AND April took up all the room on the bed, skank! then in the morning Amy's Mom made up breakfast and all that and it was awesome ... then i went to kelso's for a little while then i had to come home.... but i had such a great time i have amazing friends they are there for me through everything and i don't know what i would do with out them ... talking to them that day when i needed them helped a lot and realized a lot about what i want and how i want things to be ... but yeah it helped a lot thanks for everything girls!!! <3 Chels

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April 20th, 2004

Subject:	Aprils Entry
Time:	11:01 am

alright so ive been sick for 2 days and chelsea 2 nights ago hung out at kels house with ami katie tay mike ryan ben teej and mickey. the day that i get out and when im starting to feel a lot better chelsea enforces DYKE night and makes us stay home and watch SEX & THE CITY and sum sad, comedy romance movie called ALEX AND EMMA... we would've rather gone out but they were either sick or had to stay home. it sucked... ALOT bc i had other plans too like hanging out w. a certain someone... but no chelsea lives DYKE nights haha no its alright bc in the middle of a sex scene in SEX & THE CITY, matt gravell calls and wants to hang out. we were supposed to go to this "event" at the beach but good thing we didnt bc something awful happened. so we snuck out and he drove us around. we had INTERESTING conversations - mainly the list... which chelsea would like to add more to by the way. damn we're lucky girls haha. then we went to his house to meet his brother kenny. ha that was quite eventful. "EVE discussion on matts brother" then we drove around for another hour and went home and watched another episode on SEX & THE CITY. "i'm here. mary fucking poppins" that was great. tonight we have plans and a few options hopefully we'll hang out with AMY!! and the GIRLS! but who knows...? we MISS you AMI!!! babe i love ya hopefully we'll hang out tonight. i hope HE calls so we can finally hang out... gg tired... lexi u DYKE call ... HOE haha GREAT TIMES at ur house. more to come! xoxo

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April 17th, 2004

Subject:	If you could only understand me *
Time:	08:58 pm

Sometimes I really like it when people trust me... idk maybe thats just me but yeah anyways.....

Yesterday was fun i got to hang out with my girls... after school me april katie ker and lex all walked to Keris house... we got some pizza and had bonding time... then we went to the game such hot boys on our baseball team haha... "stop playing dike" haha good times girls but yeah then after the game me and april went to my house and got ready then went to lexis... some people were there... it was eventful!!!!! i loved it!!! lol ... then me april ang and kels left lexis and went to hang out with some people... it was a pretty fun...

Today i slepted from like 10 till 1:30... then me and april went tanning at 2 then went to the mall i got tons of stuff... i got pink shoes... and they are fucking HOT! yeah but poor april was sick the whole time... and tonight im just staying home beucase i have to babysit and im really tierd... and well yeah right now im in the worst mood... and im extremly upset.... fucking DUMB BOYS!!!!... but yeah this vaca is going to be fun i can tell.... well thats about it <3

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April 15th, 2004

Subject:	you know how i do -april
Time:	08:39 pm

im hangin out w. april but TODAY was an exciting day... i hung out with kelsea after school with april it was fun as it always is... we made lots of plans for this weekend and found very exciting activities for this upcoming spring break. haha amazing things are bound to happen and i cant wait to hang out with all my girls. IM ECSTATIC!!! sometimes i cant really describe how i feel... becuz i cant spell... right. then when kels drove me and april home we found out we were locked out and i come to find out that my cheerleading career paid off in life and i boosted april into a window and she got really dirrty and whined about it ... A LOT! haha but it was great moment. I LOVE KELS ... then me and april made SPECIAL plans! for this summer and weekend.

personal trainer to come to our house bc we're too fcuking lazy to drive there and get our bodies into shape for the sweet hot summer
ordering Victorias Secret bathing suits that will be hot
getting a job hopefully as hostesses so we can get a lot of money for the summer and to go shopping...
getting sunglasses
shop for undies and bras
TANNING our legs hahaha! from april JUST our legs... nothing else...
I need to practice driving... while april doesnt bc shes the best driver in the world....

thats about it .. so far all we can think of for right now.

yesterday was fun i went tanning with kels nothing interesing happened. i got really good information from tay and im burnt. tomororw should be KICK ASS!!! but im gonna miss tay and ami tho alright plans...

keris house
tanning
baseball game w. hott stonington guys and waterford
hanging out w. all the grlz except tay and ami bc theyre too cool haha love u grlz so much ami i miss you
hanging out w. some cool people

well waiting for tomorrow ... :)

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April 14th, 2004

Subject:	i love..... this*
Time:	02:57 pm

Today was pretty good the only thing that happend that was fun was freshman seminar and study(gym) even though i almost cried in seminar when matt told me somthing.... god it was the scarist thing that has ever happend to me i wanted to die right there... but yeah anyways then study me teej and tay went down to the gym and hung out with Ker Katie and luaren... i love all of them so much they are a funny group of girls!!!! me and ker have BIG PLANS!!!!!!!! hahaha oh taylor dont worry though ( no committing suicide ) lol!!!.... but yeah ker i need to go on your bus WINK WINK lol i love you tay!!!!!! but yeah then i got a ride home with matty and his friend was there... yeah i liked him he seemed nice.... but yeah this weekend should be alot of fun hanging out with all my girls and me and kels are setting aside some money for something!!!!!! hahaha its going to be a GREAT thing... well yeah i think thats it....

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April 11th, 2004

Subject:	Perfect*
Time:	07:56 pm

Yeah yesterday was really fun... hung out with some people!! then I slepted over aprils ... it was a really long night sleeping on a BROKEN BED!!!!! I missed all my girls this weekend... hopfully this weekend were all hang out!!!!

Kelsea Hillyer is such an amazing friend i cant remeber one time she wasnt there for me. I love how she is so cool about everything and how she isnt afraid to like talk to you about shit and she doesnt just like bitch you out... im sooooo lucky to have her as my best friend I dont know what i would do with out her!!!!

well I dont feel that great im going to go lay down....

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